I was recently buffeted by a storm of disappointment. I put hours of writing and thought into a proposal, received positive feedback along the way, and ultimately received the news, “We’ve decided to pass.”
You know how disappointment feels. You know how deep the streams of inadequacy and insecurity can run. You know the question of pushing forward or letting go.
Of course the world says, “push, Push, PUSH! now, Now, NOW!” And our pride says, “push, Push, PUSH! now, Now, NOW!”
Sometimes God also wants us to move forward with an aspiration after disappointment, but I don’t find that God screams like a squall.
When we find ourselves in a storm, bigger questions can come up—the ones of purpose, worth, and identity. Though introspection of this kind can be challenging, it can also be enlightening and redeeming.
In my recent storm, I was able to reflect with God on why I felt hurt, what I was tying my worth to, and what about me is really important. And God spoke beautiful words of peace to me—“You are my beloved daughter, and that is ultimately all that matters.”
Jesus has been doing this type of work for two thousand years. Let’s reflect on and with the Scripture of Jesus calming the storm:
“He got into a boat and his disciples followed him. Suddenly a violent storm came up on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by waves; but he was asleep. They came and woke him, saying, ‘Lord, save us! We are perishing!’ He said to them, ‘Why are you terrified, O you of little faith?’ Then he got up, rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was great calm. The men were amazed and said, ‘What sort of man is this, whom even the winds and the sea obey?’” (Matthew 8: 23-27).
Asleep in the boat, Jesus shows us what it looks like to be held in a storm. He knows who he belongs to—the Father. He rests in the Father’s care. More than Jesus calming our storms for us or taking away our storms, he accompanies us. He cradles us in the bow, rebukes the whipping winds of our fears, and brings great calm to our souls.
When we rest in the reality that we are God’s beloved ones, he gives us more than any striving ever could. When we rest in the reality that we are God’s beloved ones, he opens up new horizons right before our eyes on the peace of the waters he whispered down.